Sunbathing and blogging are two of the things I've resolved to enjoy on Sundays ...on warm Sundays anyway, since Sundays ARE times of reflection, rest, and reinvigoration. There've been reasons that I've not been available by anything but phone for a few days; but before I explain, I'll go back a month: Mike asked me to go on a trip with him to New York, and although I know it's about the only way I'll get any time with him for months, I resisted. After all these years, I still grapple with his spontaneity.
When I settled into "gone" mode, I understood how good it is for me to be reminded of what he lives with. Too, as we were entering upstate New York, I was sure that the song, "Country Must Be Countrywide," is true ...but then the further we went, the more I became dismayed at the disrepair of homes and junk piled up in yards. I'll give them that they were just then exiting winter weather and that local economies are failing, but I think it has darker implications. As we walked through Walmart, watching the people with pajamas on and teeth rotting, we agreed that we could've easily woken up there and mistaken it for the slums of the deep South.
I know what the problems are but solving them is a big bite to chew off. I AM going to make this political because ...it is. So many people are grabbing for payments for disabilities, food stamps, and unemployment that there is simply hardly any incentive to do better. (Why do better anyway when home has never been any particularly good place to be?) If you don't realize that the only reason you're getting this "special treatment" is so you won't "bite the hand that feeds you", then you're a numbskull. The moral apathy that has led to this is deep rooted and brought on as much by so called Christians as anyone. The "shifting sand" of the interpretations of Biblical and Constitutional readings has made the "home" of little regard to anyone ...except to those who cling desperately to the ideal that home is still meant to be the safe, soft, beautiful, and clean place to land after we have exerted ourselves in serving each other and our neighbors. That someone needs to guard and care for its inhabitants fulltime is tossed out as an outdated fantasy. I beg to differ. In fact, I'll fight you 'til the end on it ...and as to the benefit to women, not the entrapment that overwhelms by lighting the candle at both ends.
Society has become so lazy that Mike has serious reservations about growing another trucking company because by all reports, people just won't work, especially when it means days on the road. It didn't even work out with his good friend. He had "people" to see and places to be and work needed to be convenient. Sooo, now we're back to why my company was sought for the trip ...and why I just got back from another.
Mike threw in another "request for my presence" but to Boston this time, which was much nicer viewing. (I forgot to interject earlier that I'm not too close minded to see why liberals want to control our lives; for goodness' sake, look how so many of us are living them. It's a thought that should move us to action, not to be governed but to govern ourselves better. The thing is that they can't do it any better than we can, i.e. drivers' sleep is mandated for public safety, but there are areas where there's hardly a place to stop that isn't full, and with motor homes to boot.)
With so many things "undone", I didn't see how I could swing it with any peace of mind. So, I told him since it was a relatively simple delivery that he should take one of the little ones. As I moved about getting things "done", he came up with the brilliant idea of the two of us going with the two little ones. Since the older ones would be relieved of childcare, they could complete the projects of the week. Hmm, couldn't argue that.
As Macklynn, 7, sang "I'm so excited and I just can't hide it", we piled in blankets and pillows and toys and books and ..., Mike said he'd just heard that it was National Take Your Kids to Work Day. Well now, don't go around saying I don't observe any holidays! We hit the road as they watched on their elbows out the back windows. It wasn't too long before they grew bored of it and times like those are when I'm glad for Mobigo's and Dsi's ...because, as Dr. Laura Schlessinger says, I wanted to be my husband's "girlfriend". We listened to her show, as we did the last trip, and I committed some tidbits of her advice to memory, so I could check myself and pass it along. Dead ringers for killing a relationship are threatening, nitpicking, clinginess/neediness, and untrustworthiness. For a relationship to thrive, fun and laughing are musts. And as Mike keeps proving, details ...attention to the small things, showing that I matter ...is huge in setting a ship on a different course ...actually, the opposite course.
Right this second the 60 hours of our "voyage" is hazy. Mike took several naps and as soon as we would get 2 of us on the top bunk and 2 on the bottom cozied up, Madalynn, 4, would need something. It was much like a camping trip that I was less than fond of. I'll say on her behalf though that she quietly played her game when she couldn't sleep.
Mike left Macklynn and me on the bottom, wider and softer, mattress for one nap. He reached down to hold my hand and I thought it was very picturesque. He had to get down for something and when he got back on, the corner over my head released. In all the years of riding, I've always been afraid that could happen! ...not that I couldn't stand a little "flattening".
The first night I lay awake as Macklynn sat in the front with Mike for 5 hours asking question after question. As we were approaching New York City, Mike would say, "Look at that!" Macklynn would say, "Daddy, what's the name of that?" He said Daddy so many times that Mike started saying Macklynn before each answer. I giggled, feeling very privileged to hear their volley.
Day 2 I finished "Rescuing Sprite" that Mike bought me. It was hard to read but it let me know that I'm not alone in putting a dog in the category of "beloved". The children were awaiting a stop at Cabela's and it couldn't have come soon enough because even though I tried to engage them with library books, they were bouncing around and sliding off the beds enough for me to say that not mothering any more at my age was wise. Cabela's is kinda like going to the zoo ...if you don't mind the mammals and reptiles being stuffed. Madalynn surely didn't. Macklynn was so elated to look at lures that he sort of rushed through the wall-sized aquariums.
Homebound at dusk, I pulled out the big gun, my designer white flannel gown, and told Mike I was ready for some "truckin'", but he was ready for another nap. He gets so worn out. On the road again, we pulled into his usual fuel stop and ran dry about a football field short of the pumps, so he had to run back and forth a gallon at a time until finally I, in all my flanneled glory, pushed in the clutch and turned the ignition while he sprayed ether. It did the trick and that's what comes with years of experience. Underestimating, now that comes with years of risk taking ;)
Home! I had supper started, a shower, laundry going in no time ...that is, after I admired all the big kids had gotten done, including organization, laundry, wall repair and painting! I had a couple more hours to girl up for what I predict to be one of Lee Brice's last small venue concerts. When we got to Coyote Joes, there were already 3,000 people there, but they must've been waiting for us (after we delivered the nursery's trailer back in SC and arrived 15 minutes before the show at 11 pm) because I got a free CD as Mike showed them our tickets he'd gotten on line.
He'd been saying we needed a date but I didn't know it would be that good and at such a great price. Lee Brice is a true talent ...writing, singing, and playing guitars for his own songs. He's an absolute entertainer and had the crowd turned up. The fun had only begun as we left for the truck at 1:30. Let's just say there are unmentionables still missing in the truck. It's completely cool when you have your own bed (to sleep in, of course ;) in the parking lot. What really sealed the deal for me was this morning after he reloaded, he got us both breakfast. I told him that I'd place a rare turn down for coffee to have a Coke with ice. They didn't have Coke so he went from the restaurant into the station only to find that their machine was down, so he got a bottled Coke and a cup of ice. He went ahead and got coffee too, fixing it with just the right amount of sugar and cream. Too, he didn't forget the ketchup for the food and if you know me well, you know it matters. To top it off, although I need it like a cat needs a hairball, he surprised me with a fresh Boberry Biscuit. Why tell you about the details of a fast food meal? There was a time when the minute things would've done nothing but agitate him. Now, he's using them to turn the ship ...and oftentimes the smallest things quicken the arrival.
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