This Christmas

     This morning my "memories" reminded me that three years ago, I was invited to celebrate Christmas with the 6 month old twins that I had only seen a handful of times. By the look on my face, you could tell I was desperately grateful... and desperately tired from the tsunami that hit our family that year. 

     I really didn't have anything to give so I printed out relevant scripture for each one and framed it. And h.o.p.e. Ministries is the only reason the kids at home got anything. Here is a post about it that I never published or completed: https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/5869496433102770626/5864514521123043544. They helped once more the following year as we were reunited and waiting on Mike's Social Security Disability to be approved. 

     Last year, while everyone else was in dire financial straits, Jeremiah and Megan were on the road "raking it in" and made sure everyone got a little something by way of the Saran Wrap Ball game. I struggle with the emphasis on gifts at Christmas; nevertheless, I didn't want Macklynn and Madalynn to become takers rather than givers. So, we devised ideas for each sibling household that would be specifically from them. They paid $20 of Melody and Miranda's power bill. They cleaned Michael's car inside and out. They bought Timothy and McKala a gift card to go on a date. And they bought Megan a gift card for a manicure, and we gave Jeremiah some Kohl's cash. 

     This year the adult kids drew names. It has been another lean one, and I thought it'd be good to get Melody's truffle recipe and have the kids make batches for everyone. Lo and behold, Madalynn came down with a cold last weekend and Macklynn started coming down with it yesterday. So, even that hasn't worked out. However, as we were all gathered together yesterday, we found that the sisters had decided to buy gifts for everyone, just the way Michael did three years ago. 

     So, we shift. No one expects anything. In return, it always works out; Michael made that observation last night. We don't have particular traditions, and I hope it stays that way, that everyone remains thankful for whatever comes, like the little job Mike and I have picked up delivering cars to and from auctions, which provided in the nick of time the ability to buy everyone something from the Carhartt store and to put three or four gifts for Macklynn and Madalynn under the tree.

    Madalynn asked on the way home, during the "search for snow" ride Mike took us on (and found), if the presents left under the tree were for the two of them. She said it was a lot. And I know that it's not, but that she is so grateful for so little breaks my heart and lets me know that through everything they have learned so much. 

A Baby Changes Everything

                                                         

          

     "Mary, Did You Know?" is a favorite Christmas song. Every time I hear it though, I say to myself, "Of course, she knew." Luke 1:46-55, otherwise known as the Magnificat, is a "song" that begins with Mary's saying, "My soul doth magnify the Lord, and my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour. For he hath regarded the low estate of his handmaiden: for, behold, from henceforth all generations shall call me blessed. For he that is mighty hath done to me great things; and holy is his name." 

     So, I prefer the song, "A Baby Changes Everything." 

     Today was Megan's last day of work for good. Their first baby is due in 10 more weeks, and she is preparing to endeavor on the full-time work that solely belongs to her, the mother of her new baby girl. Now 30, Megan's been working hard since she was 16 years old. I've rarely gotten to spend much time with her since, so I love that they are living nearby and that it just so happens that I see her daily sometimes.

     Tomorrow begins the era of her not making her "own money," relying on Jeremiah to provide for her and their baby. They might do without. Her sister did, if living in America can qualify for that; they had just one car for a while - she got up in the mornings and took him to work if she needed to go somewhere. They didn't and still don't have a dishwasher. And there were many other things they did without that I'm sure I don't know about.  

     But everything "done without" is transposed into irreplaceable moments and opportunities because "A Baby Changes Everything." 

     

     

If It's Not One Thing, It's Another

     I have hundreds and hundreds of pages of words I've put to paper. I still am in the process of submitting before the Lord in what order they should be, what conclusions should be made, and what perspective should be used. In the meantime, I still have rushes of thoughts that bring me back here, blogging. 

     Because I have not severed my relationship with Facebook (although I have recently written all the names and information of "friends" I want to stay in touch with when I do), I was scrolling through and saw some things I didn't know. It reminded me to count my blessings, all seven of  "them." Infertility and miscarriages are things I know nothing of. But I do know something of the difficulties of marriage. I said recently that perhaps God gave me the ease of childbearing knowing that marriage would not be so.

     I had another conversation recently about vaccinations. And for some reason, I thought of our collard green patch. It had caterpillars up until it got really cold; not only do they eat away the leaves, they might wind up on a plate. We could spray the plants, but it's easy enough to wash the leaves in the sink. Regardless, we had collard green trouble, and now they will probably die soon given a stay of freezing temperatures. We do not live in a perfect world. Period. 

     I know that my profile picture for this blog site needs to be updated so I'm working on the damage that I've sustained and have allowed to change my appearance and health. My hair is growing again. I'm glad for the hair I have. Again, I consider it a blessing, God knowing how awful the veins on my legs would be. 

     We just never know what we're gonna get. One person's child dies; another one's wants to die. These kinds of situations are what "I can do all things" is about. I read this morning, "He that handleth a matter wisely shall find good: and whoso trusteth in the LORD, happy is he" (Proverbs 16:20). It's not always that we don't trust God but that we don't trust ourselves and won't ask to made like Him, only that our circumstances be made easier. There is perceived difficulty in every choice and every encounter until we decide that God knows best and hears our prayers when we repent and answers them according to His own wisdom and pleasure.